Wife Cold

As of today you are 17 weeks and 3 days old! That means you are now at least the size of an onion! It's fitting that your week as an onion should have begun with such stinky circumstances, since, well, onions stink.

This weekend, your Mother got a cold, and that stunk for everyone (almost as much as a giant onion).

On Friday afternoon she wasn't looking too good and by Friday night she took a turn for the worse.

Despite drinking lots of tea and put Mentholatum on her feet, your Mom woke up Saturday morning (actually, it was closer to afternoon) with a full blown cold:

Drainage, Sore Throat, Achy Ears, M's turning into B's (you know like saying "Bobby" instead of "Mommy"), Exhausted, Miserable, Stuffed Up Nose, Headache and a wonderful Cough!

The only problem is, when you're pregnant you can't take the same medicines you'd usually use to kick a cold's butt. After a call to the doctor, we started your Mom on a healthy diet of Mucinex and Acetemeniphen. (NO Ibuprofen for preggo-ladies!)

But, medicine alone can't cure a cold. So, your Dad played nurse all day Saturday and took a wholistic approach to making your Mom feel better.

By the end of Sunday afternoon, you and your Mom had:

• spent over 36 uniterrupted hours indoors


• eaten approximately 64 ounces of Egg Drop soup


• drank 3 bottles of Gatorade (blue, yellow and orange!)


• used 80 tissues (an entire box)


• drank 7 cups of decaffeinated tea and four cups of warm apple juice


• Used at least 3 Breath-right strips


• Put 10 olive-oil soaked cotton balls in her ears (backwoods medicine)


• Breathed in 3 full containers of Humidified Air Water

I also have to tell you that you suffered a significant exposure to a film genre called "Chick Flicks" on Saturday.

Back-to-Back-to-Back, your Mom watched her favorite movies, and you had a front-row seat some of the best make-Holly-feel-better movies out there:

"Ever After," "The Princess Bride" and "Shakespeare in Love"

Your First Chick Flick Marathon. Hopefully your last? (Note: I approve of most of these movies for repeated viewing...just not one that rhymes with "shmever shmafter")

The good news is that in a genre that contains some of the worst movies of all time, you managed to have a mother who likes some of the best of them. That is to say, I mostly approve of the movies you watched, despite them definitely being "Chick Flicks." But Drew Barrymore still kind of talks funny (you'll see what I mean).

But, the good news is that you and your Mother survived! By Sunday morning your Mom was feeling markedly better. See, all that medicine and loving care and MSG worked! Either that or it was a 48-hour bug and our actions had no effect, and you suffered through 7 hours of Chick flick for nothing.

Even though our weekend was ostensibly stinky as an onion, your Mom and you and I did get to spend a lot of time together and talk about you and your nursery and your name and registering for all the things you'll need. So, all in all, despite the living room turning into a makeshift sick ward, it wound up being a pretty nice weekend: unless you were once a tree that was turned into tissues. In that case, this weekend blew.

First Contact

Pregnancy has, of course, changed your Mother and Me (and most definitely you)! Some of these changes will be "forever" changes (and we can't wait for those), some will be only temporary. Some are complete reversals of Weinstein-family policies and those are the most shocking kind!

As an example, last night your Mom said she wanted Chinese food for dinner.

I suggested, "How 'bout we try that buffet near our house?"

Normally, that is to say "pre-pregnancy," that question would have been answered with a categorical, emphatic "NO WAY. We do not do buffets." (This policy was set in place after years of your dear old Dad gorging and then whining to your Mom about forcing him to eat so much.)

Much to my surprise, without even a hestiation, your Mom said "Sounds great!"

I was so surprised and excited about the prospects of gorging myself that I had to do a double take. But she actually did say "Yes!"

So off we went. And gorge myself, I did. (This restaurant was also a really good weapon in my arsenal to slightly fatten your Mom up!)

But, at the restaurant your Mom and I witnessed another "new change," but this one's only temporary. That's right, we experienced First Contact: the first of what is probably going to be a major (temporary) change due to you growing in her belly! Now, first contact doesn't mean that she finally felt you move in her tummy (but I'm gonna keep trying!), or that I could finally hear your heart beat through her bellybutton, or that aliens landed and decided to go to a Chinese Buffet (though I don't know what that has to do with anything).

The monumental First Contact in this case was a total "Wow, we really are pregnant, aren't we?" moment! That's right, on a very special bite of food's long journey from the plate on the table to your Mom's mouth, a big droplet of Sweet and Sour sauce took a nosedive off the morsel and landed squarely on the your Mom's belly.

This was, officially, the first piece of food that your Mom has spilled on the baby bump.

As you continue to grow, and your Mom has to sit further and further away from the table, I'm sure, though, that it will not be the last. We may have to pre-use your bibs!

Please note: I routinely spill food on my belly, but that is not news in any way at all.

Food Stain? No problem for Oxi clean. And no, that guy doesn't look like me at all.