What did the Papa Tomato Say to The Baby Tomato when he was lagging behind?

Ketchup!

As you get to know me, you'll find that I have tons of awesome jokes like that.

But, today, we're going to play "ketchup" and take a look at how much you've grown over the past 4 weeks!

Week 31

Week 32


Week 33



Week 34

As you can tell, the wardrobe choices are become slimmer and slimmer as your Mother becomes...pregnanter and pregnanter.

You can also see how well your nursery is coming together! We did, in fact, hang up the illustrations I told you about so long ago!

Even though I talk to you every day and write to you almost as often, I still can't wait for you to actually come out so we can talk face to face, and finally have the time to catch up, for real!

Plus, I literally have dozens of amazing jokes to tell you!

Heads and Nails

Week 34 is a big week in your development. It kind of seems like a bunch of grand openings were just announced. Check out all that you're able to do right now, according to the bump and some other sources:

• When light peeks in through your Mom's belly (whose thin is stretched thin), your tiny eyelids and irises can blink and dilate. So maybe I won't shine the flashlight in your eyes!
• You are now smart enough to recognize and react to simple songs… That means you may already recognize your lullabye that I've been singing!
• Your finger and toe nails are growing fast and long...and they're sharp too. Good thing we got the baby finger nail clippers we'd been eyeballin'!

For all this development, though, it still seems like you're miles away from coming out to meet us. Although we only have 38 official days to go, it seems like an eternity. Not that we're anxious, but time is definitely dragging, especially when I read about how much of a working, functioning little person you are in there.

But, you do need more time in the oven until you're ready to come out.

For now, you stay in that oven and we'll just have to wait, and appreciate you from the outside. Yesterday you gave us a great opportunity to do so. While your Mom was sprawled out on the couch she grabbed my hand and placed it to her belly.

"What is that?" I asked.

"I don't know," she said.

"It's too big to be a hand or a foot. Is it a head?"

"Maybe..." she smiled in awe.

(Don't ask me how she can smile in awe, she just can).

But, there I was, with my hand palming something the size of a large orange. It could have been your butt, but I prefer to think it was your head. And that means you must have been sleeping the way I sometimes do on planes: head first.

It was almost as if you were trying to peak your head into our conversation. But, as you can tell from above, the conversation wasn't too intelligent anyway.

But, it was full of awe.

Testing the Waters

It's been almost a week since I've written to you, but, don't worry, I haven't been away from you at all.

In fact, I was by your side pretty much the whole time. But that's only because your Mom was by my side.

I had surgery last Thursday in anticipation of your arrival. Seeing your due date approaching faster and faster, I finally decided to do something I've been wanting to do for a long time: have my broken sniffer repaired.

I had what they call a deviated septum, which means that I couldn't really breathe through my nose properly. I hope you get your mother's nose, if only to avoid the deviation and the surgery.

But there was no avoiding it for me. I wanted to be able to be firing on all cylinders (and all nostrils) for all of our time together, so I decided to get the surgery done.

Your Mother - at 34 weeks pregnant- has been my "patient" for a long time, as I've been "babying" her (with good reason) for a lot of the pregnancy. (It's my pleasure to do so, seriously. ) But, starting on Thursday, I was in no condition to take care of your Mom; and she was awesome enough to take care of me.

Let's just say I was testing your Mom's maternal medical instincts- and she passed with super 'A plusses.'

She did the gross (like cleaning out my nose with Q-tips and changing my bandages and not cringing when I had to spit up blood and crud).

She was patient ( like putting up with me, and even being kind to me, while I was on pain killers that made me loopy).

She was strong for me (like telling me it would all be okay, when I was definitely feeling like it wouldn't).

She lifted my spirits (and made my laugh when I didn't feel like I could, and definitely when my stiff face and nasal stitches told me that I shouldn't-- but, despite the brief pain, laughter was the best medicine).

She took my temperature, administered my medicines, taught me how to clean up my own nose and- heck- she even washed my hair.

And all this while 34 weeks pregnant with a ever-growing, kinda painful honeydew in her belly! I knew she was hurting and tired too, but she helped me get better despite that.

So, all that is to say: when your Mom has to take care of you, I know for sure that you are in good hands. That's not to say that there was any doubt before, since she's taken care of me while I was ill (or just bummed) many times over the past 12 years. But this was just a recent reaffirmation that, really, I couldn't ask for a better wife and you couldn't ask for a better mother.

(And, no, I'm not sucking up to her; I'm just calling it like I sees it!)

Your Beautiful Mother, Trying Hard not to Smile

But, I wasn't the only one testing the waters this weekend. As you passsed your 34th week-iversary, you really started testing your Mother too. With one foot - or maybe two- firmly placed against her ribs on her right hand side, you started pushing, and stretching and stretching some more.

This is your new favorite trick; and you've been doing it sporadically all weekend, especially near bedtime. As last night was my first night back in bed (after being quarantined on the couch, to avoid a thrashing Holly hitting my face during my sleep), I was able to feel your foot pressing against her ribs and then pushing even more.

I gently held on to your foot and tried to encourage you to push it down away from her ribs, kind of like scooting a under-the-blankets tennis ball down a bed from on top of the covers (haven't you ever done that before?). But your foot firmly remained in your mother's ribs, definitely testing the limits of discomfort. So, I tried again, this time talking you through it, and almost massaging your Mom's ribs to encourage you to scoot your foot elsewhere.

To be honest, I don't really remember if I was able to get you to move your foot away, because I fell asleep - all this facial healing takes a lot of energy out of you. But, rest assured, after yours and my combined weekend of testing your Mom's strength and resolve and patience, I'm now ready to resign the efforts back to you: it's your solo gig once again.

Worry not, though- I won't leave your side for too long at all. But it will be because I will be by your Mom's side; hopefully helping her, and making her laugh, and making her dinner as you continue to kick her ribs all the way to the finish line, which is now under 40 days away.

An On-Time Weinstein?

Your Mom went to see Dr. Hagood today, and everything is progressing just perfectly!

Your Mom is gaining weight at the right tempo: Today she weighed in at 146 pounds. December 16, your Mom weighed 142 at the doctor's office. So, that means she's gained 4 pounds in 5 weeks. (and 31 pounds overall!) Not quite up to the pound-a-week that they wanted her to be gaining in this trimester, but no one's arguing over a pound.

Even though your mom is very consciously approaching an all-time close proximity to my weight, she is right on target for this stage of pregnancy. She's not in any danger of turning into a Jek Porkins, by any means!

This weight gain being right on target, would indicate that you may be one of the few Weinsteins who isn't chronically late. After measuring your Mom's weight, belly circumference and your heart beat, Dr. Hagood said that you're 'right on target.'

And if we stay on target, then you'll be an early March baby just as predicted.

Stay on Target

And, Dr. Hagood also told your Mom that she wouldn't LET you be too late. If you're not here by March 13th, then the good doctor is going to assist your arrival. Forcefully.

So, you will be an on-time Weinstein after all. I guess the question now, though, is will you be an Early Weinstein? (So very few "early Weinsteins" exist in the wild or captivity that they're almost an endangered species!)

The Honeydew Period

Feel like you've been squashed for far too long? No, I'm not talking about the rapidly dwindling amount of space you have in your Mom's tummy-- though, I bet that's really squashed quarters. I'm talking about your fruit/veg comparison continuum. After spending 4 weeks on the scales as a "squash," you've now officially been upgraded:

You're now the size of a Honeydew Melon (you know, cantaloupe's amazing, green cousin)! (remind me to tell you a HILARIOUS joke when you come out about why the honeydew told the watermelon they couldn't run away to get married).

What's even more amazing, is that after a honeydew holding pattern for a few weeks, you've only got one more fruit on the list: Watermelon. Clearly these last few weeks are all melon, but that doesn't make us melancholy in any way. Granted, your Mom is struggling a bit in her landings and takeoffs from couches, beds and the floor, and her back pain is getting especially ripe, but she's just ecstatic to have a little honeydew-sized honey growing in her belly! And, in my opinion, she looks absolutely beautiful carrying you, despite the presence of 2/3 of a fruit salad in her tummy.

When we got married, someone told me that I would forever be subject to "honeydew lists;" clearly, this refers to you in this 8th month of pregnancy in some Nostradamus way. Actually, no it doesn't, but it's quite poetic, no? The honeydew list in question is, in fact, a reference to some stereotypical nagging wife forcing her bedraggled husband to do multiple chores: "Honey, Do this!" "Honey, do that!" Well, your Mother's and my relationship doesn't really work like that, as you'll soon know. Sure, we have to-do lists that we both freely populate and depopulate, but there's hardly any nagging. Unless the item on the list is something that I don't really want to do at all, in which case, some nagging or pouting may be necessary to get my butt in gear.

But, at any rate, this weekend - to celebrate your arrival as a honeydew- your Mom and I crossed another item off of our pregnancy honeydew lists. And this was one item that we've both been looking forward to, as it stretched our creative muscles!

A lot of people get professional pictures taken when they're pregnant (these are called maternity pictures). Your Mom thought that I could do a good enough job taking these pictures and -that way- we could have a really cool, personal experience taking them and save a little extra cash to get professional studio pictures taken when you are born!

So, we hung up some sheets, cleaned ourselves up and turned your nursery into a photography studio! I don't consider myself an awesome photographer at all. But, I have an awesome camera (thanks to Cousin Steve and Ruthy!), and your Mom is awesome at Photoshop, and that seemed to do the trick!

These pictures really just confirm three things for me: 1) your Mom truly makes a beautiful pregnant lady; 3) You're a good looking bump, and have been all the way from the beginning of lime to this, our honeydew period; 3) your Mom takes better photographs than she gives haircuts (note to self- pay for haircuts).

Attempting some Jedi Mind Tricks

Elegant Honeydew!

My Honey and our Honeydew

Take amazing pictures?

Honey done!

Even though you're no longer a squash, and you're definitely getting more and more squashed with each passing day, you make a peach of a honeydew!

Clearly You're Nuts!

We're officially 33 weeks pregnant as of this weekend, and the time is just flying. To celebrate your 33rd week of development, we really kicked the shopping into high gear. This weekend we went to:

• 2 different Babies 'R' Us Locations
• The same Super Target twice (on two separate days (both for baby related returns/purchases))
• A NEW Buy Buy Baby location

I know, I know. It sounds riveting, and all this baby shopping sounds like it would be enough to castrate the most testosterone-filled manly man. You might even think that a man would have to be nuts to withstand this amount of baby shopping and perusing and returning and coupon clipping. But, despite the hives that I still get in Babies R Us (now proven to be hive-worthy in multiple locations!), it's always a great adventure going baby shopping with your mom. And, after all, you're my baby too! So, heck yeah, you'll find me in Buy Buy Baby or the baby aisle in Target without batting an eyelash. But, seriously, Babies R Us- even though I like your coupons (which I then use at Buy Buy Baby) and your clearance items- your stores are probably very close to what H-E-double hockey sticks might be like. So, no, you don't have to be nuts to go baby shopping- in fact, I kind of like it. Plus, then I can talk about the nipples and breast pump adapters we got and freak out our less baby-ready friends and family.

Speaking of going nuts, though, in week 33-34 of your development, your testicles are making their way down from your abdomen to their final destination: your scrotum. I had mine in my abdomen once; but Six Flags closed that roller coaster down after several complaints.

But seriously, though, I think a Mazel Tov is in order! Not only are your testicles descending faster than the ball in Times Square on New Years Eve (yes, I'm questioning if this simile is appropriate for you to read), but you are also growing very quickly too. From here on out, you will be gaining about a half a pound a week! Compared to the fact that your Mom is gaining 1 pound a week, your growth is no small peanuts!

And, considering that your Mimi and Pops are taking your Mother and Me to Texas de Brazil (all you can eat meat!) tonight, I may gain a half a pound or more too! Clearly the nut doesn't fall too far from the tree!

The Shower: A Photo Pictorial

I feel like I've been a tad bit verbose the past couple of days. I just can't help it: I have lots of thoughts when it comes to you and your Mother and this journey upon which we are embarking.


But today, I'll try to be quiet, and just share some photos with you of the Baby Shower your Grandmas held for us last Saturday. It was an exciting day not only because of the shower, but also because last Saturday officially marked the beginning of our 32nd week of pregnancy AND our 8th month.

So now, feast your eyes on the event that was your Baby Shower!

It was a cold day in Dallas:

Our frozen waterfall in our frozen pond. Do you like frozen fish?

The shower was thrown by your Nannah Joon and Mimi - with a lot of help from your Great Aunt Chrissy:

Touched by a Grandma (or two)

And, the game we devised (called "Mr. Baby Head), where people make a collage of your Mom's and my baby features to create a really creepy creation (which will look nothing like you) was a big success! Look at how much fun they're having!

The results weren't too frightening. It was hard for your Mom to pick a winner!


And some people even played jokes on us:

Danny and Jeremy thought it would be funny to get a pink "Daddy's little princess" outfit. Real men do wear pink and all, but the princess part might not fly.

But we were honored with some very special non-joke gifts for you too! And apparently I made progressively dumber and dumber faces; good thing that old trick still makes your Mom laugh or I'd be up a creek!

I even tried on some of your clothes. Hope you don't mind!

Your Pops bought your Mom a bouquet of beautiful roses!

And we had fun with some of your cousins and aunts and uncles too!

Here's you and your cousin Addison

Your Aunt Sham is, indeed, eating a cupcake

Your Uncle Taff and cousin Autumn

Oh, and did I mention there were balloons? Everyone loves balloons!

Even new friendships were forged: Heck, look at Autumn and Brooks Livingston hanging out for the first time!

Autumn may have gotten a bit handsy. Brooks didn't seem to mind.

It was a wonderful shower made extra special by the company: great family, amazing old friends, wonderful new friends and a very very special bump!

Thank you to everyone for this special day!

Don't worry. We'll take the balloons off before you wear the shoes.

Pains and Names: You're number one!

So, now that it's 2010, the official lists for the most popular names of 2009 have come out and, not surprisingly, your name is tops on the list (though it is spelled differently, so technically it counts as a different name).

This wasn't really a surprise, though. Back in the summer when we were coming up with names for you, we really liked the name we eventually chose for you. I'd never met anyone with that name and your mother had only met one. We knew it wasn't the world's most original name, and that it is night impossible to come up with a truly original name that won't be shared with anyone else in the world. Unless you wanted a name like "Urashfsd" or "Hzbsba." And we simply don't earn enough money to afford to name you after an inanimate object like "Apple" or "Paper Clip" or "Seesaw" or "Trigger" like so many rock stars can afford to do.

Using the really cool tool on the Social Security website, we searched your name and saw that over the past years it's been trending upward. So, yeah, we knew it was a popular name. But we didn't know it was going to be number 1 for last year! I mean, for 2008, your name wasn't even on the top 10 list. That means you sky rocketed past Jacob, Michael, Ethan, Joshua, Daniel, Alexander, Anthony, William, Christopher to take the number one spot!

You're number one!

But, even being number one doesn't make a name that popular. For example, last year's number one, Jacob, represented 1.035 % of the people born and named in 2008. That means that about one out of 100 people were named Jacob. So, it'll all depend on WHICH 100 people you choose to hang out with!

Even though we knew it was a popular name, we still decided to give you this name. We love the flow of it, the name itself, the way it fits with our last name, the fact that it honors my Grandmother, the meaning, the sound and- already- it is just...YOU!


It is interesting, though, how names like yours suddenly enter the national conciousness.

Even though we seem to have tapped into some sort of national cosmic trend without knowing it or doing it intentionally, we are sticking with your name! So, forget about it if there are 10 other kids with your name in your 1st grade class: you're still the only you on the planet! Your feelings shouldn't be hurt if you have to share your name with some other cool kids.

You are number one in another category too, though, and this one's a little bit more painful.

With the finish line in sight, the pregnancy is really starting to shift gears toward discomfort and pain.

Your mom just can't get comfortable while she's sleeping because her belly is so big.
She has these short and sorta painful fake contractions, which are just her body prepping for the big day.
Her pants ripped yesterday when she sat down (although, they were old pajama pants that she's had since she was a teenager...but it was still really funny!)

And now, your kicks and movements and jabs are tickling less and less and starting to shock and awe more and more.

Apparently, the bigger you get, the less room there is for amniotic fluid, so the body stops producing it. The lack of amniotic fluid means that there's a lot less cushioning between your fists, elbows, feet and head and your Mom's internal organs and ribs.

But, with pain comes pleasure (it's one of those dumb dualities of life); and you already are giving us so much pleasure in our lives that the pain (which surely pales in comparison to the potential pain down the road...in a month or two) is totally worth it!

So keep on kicking, buddy, and we'll keep watching for your feet to ripple under your Mom's belly. And while I'm smiling at the opportunity to feel you kick, and your Mother is grimacing, just know that we are eagerly waiting your arrival.

See, you're number one already!

8 months in...and you're unbelievable

It's hard to believe but as of Saturday- the day of our Shower for you- we are 32 weeks along. That officially puts us in our 8th month of pregnancy! In an effort to avoid cussing, but still express to you the enormity of this number and the awe we are in at the proximity of your impending birth, I'll say the following (because I like fishing): "HOLY CARP! We're 8 months pregnant!"

It seems just like yesterday that we were in awe of being 10 weeks pregnant! But now, this is getting real.

It's hard to believe that you're now over 3 pounds and around 16.5 inches long (if averages are supposed to be trusted). It's hard to believe that your Mom is starting to have what the book is calling "Braxton Hicks" contractions, which is basically her body practicing for delivering you.

It's hard to believe that you're now using all 5 of your senses actively. It's hard to believe that you could already be sucking your thumb and (believe it or not) crying in there! But, just like crying in space, no one can hear you scream in utero.

It's hard to believe that you're blinking and dreaming and learning already.

Finally, though, here's something that I CAN readily believe: now that you're 8 months in, your skin is no longer transparent. With all the baby fat you've been accumulating over the past months, your skin is finally getting to be opaque. And that's way easier to picture than transparent skin.

Speaking of accumulating fat: the food at the shower was great! I ate a lot of it, to be honest. But I did leave some for your guests. We couldn't have done it without your Grandmas (Mimi and Nannah Joon) and your Great Aunt Chrissy who all rocked the house with their food and party planning.

And the games were a lot of fun too. A lot of people had far too much fun with the "what will you look like" game, creating monsters that are even creepier than the well-intentioned cut-and-paste babies.

I'll show you some of the "winners" later this week. But, just to prep you, we know you're not going to have two heads, or noses for ears. You're going to be far cuter than that! And that, too, isn't hard to believe at all (you'll believe me when you see these collages).

Showers (expected and otherwise)

This weekend is the baby shower in your honor! What? You didn't get the invitation? It's alright, we already knew you would RSVP yes; you pretty much had to.

What is a shower, you may ask? Well, primarily it's a device in which one cleans himself thanks to running water and a drain. But, that's not the type we're having for you. It's when all of the people who already love you get together and SHOWER you with love, and affection, and excitement and gifts, if they so choose.

There's going to be a lot of good food, which I know you'll love. There are going to be some fun games too. But not "everyone come play this game" game... more like "anyone can play this if they want to."

In one game, your guests can cut and paste together pictures of what they think you might look like, using your Mom's and my baby features. Here's a test your Mom did on the computer:

This game absolutely frightens me. I hope you can see why. You kind of look like a monkey wearing someone else's face like a Mexican Wrestler Mask. But that's okay. It's still a cute idea and should theoretically be fun for anyone who wants to play!

We're also doing a little illegal gambline and wagering. People are going to place bets on the date and time they think you'll be born. But, don't worry, it's not for money: it's for chocolate.

I like chocolate, and I love you: so I'm going to go ahead and be the first to wager. I think you'll be born on March 3, 2010 at 7:30 pm.

Hopefully I win some chocolate. But, either way I win because you will be here finally!

Now, onto less expected precipitation. I don't want to say too much so as to not gross anyone out, but let's just say that if your Mother were currently any setting in the Harry Potter series, she'd currently have to be called the Leaky Cauldron. She just discovered that this morning! It's definitely weird, but it's completely normal and only concretizes the idea even further: you're coming, and you'll be here in about 2 months...

on precisely March 3 at 7:30 pm! (c'mon...Daddy needs some new chocolate!)

Oh what a difference 20 weeks makes

20 weeks ago your Mom was 11 weeks pregnant. And my what a difference 20 weeks can make.

20 weeks ago it was mid August and very nice temperatures outside. Everyone was comfortable. Your Mom was hot. Today it is early January and we are in the middle of the coldest winter streak Dallas has had for a long time. The high today was 30 degrees. Everyone is freezing. Your Mom is finally comfortable. Temperature-wise.



20 weeks ago your Mom reported raging cravings. Now I can report of your Mom's raving rages! Well, they're not really rages, but due to hormones, she can't really seem to help being easily agitated and, therefore, snapping at anyone who annoys her. This is not good for me, as the "A" in "Aaron" (the second one) actually stands for "annoying." But, seriously, sometimes there is no logic to her snapping. For instance, while we were driving to the doctor for this morning's appointment at 9 am, I decided to chime in with Boston (playing on the radio) and hit the high note in "More than a Feeling." This was interpreted by your Mother as "yelling in the car," and I was told that it was far to early for such behavior. Talk about irrational hormonal anger!

20 weeks ago your Mom and I were shivering in our (metaphorical) boots. We were uninformed, mostly scared about how to care for a baby and what kind of parents we'd be. Today we're shivering in our (real) boots (or at least I am, your mother seems to think that 20 degrees is the new 50 (see above)), but we're only kinda scared now. In fact, we're mostly ready for you to come out and meet us!

20 weeks ago your Mom could see her feet. Today, well, you get the picture.
20 weeks ago your nursery was a dining room. Today the old dining room is almost a nursery, the old record stand between the windows is a dining room, the old unused space by the front door is now where the record player stays, the old coat closet is a bass closet, the old bass closet is a nursery closet and the old nook under the stairs is a coat closet. And we're not even closet cases yet.

And in less than 6 weeks, now, you could be born!

Hiccups, Toe-Tapping and other Movements

As was promised in many of the books we've been reading, you, sir, have been getting the hiccups quite frequently. How can we tell?


Well, that's really easy for me, because your Mom says, "He's got the hiccups again."






How can she tell? That's a bit trickier. But, sometimes when you move it's a regular, rhythmic pulse that just so gently vibrates your Mom's tummy. I can feel it when I put my hand on her belly, and the difference between hiccups and your regular tumbles and rollovers and stretches is noticeable.

But, then again, maybe you're tapping your toes or snapping.

A few times your Mom has sworn that you've been getting hiccups in beat with the music that she's listening too. Who hiccups in beat? Perhaps you're just a natural born musician...both of your parents kinda have the music gene, afterall!

Or maybe we're just going crazy a little bit and looking for patterns and cognisance that isn't there yet....or is it?

The benefit to all this movement, besides that it demonstrates that you're active and healthy, is that you make it really easy to count your movements. We're supposed to keep track and make sure that you kick at least 10 times within an hour, twice a day.

With all this hiccupping, and moving and dancing, you move 10 times in 4 minutes! Even last night, as we lay in bed, I had my hand on your Mom's belly and felt you kicking like crazy as I fell asleep.

A lovely diagram of how big you are at 31 weeks. Not much room for toe-tapping.

It's official...

It's now 2010-- the year in which you'll be born! We're 31 weeks now. You could be here in as little as 5 weeks! But, your Mom is still hoping you stay in there for 9 weeks, simply because February is a pretty crowded birthday month in our family and March is mostly unclaimed territory!

But, your Mom may be changing her tune relatively soon. In the past couple of days her back has been getting more and more sore, and she hasn't been able to find that "sweet spot" for sleeping.

In fact, last night before we went to bed, your Mom said these infamous words:

"It's official: I'm uncomfortable."

But not to worry: you're doing everything you're supposed to be doing. You're growing, kicking, hiccupping, sleeping and (I think) sometimes you're dancing too. But maybe you don't have to dance right on your mother's spine.

Now that you weight at least 3 pounds and are about 16 inches long (from head to toe), it makes sense that your mother is officially (on the record) uncomfortable! You're nearing your birth length! But, you're probably not even halfway to your birthweight yet. So, maybe, by the end of this month, your Mom will be rooting for a February baby!