The Things You Say 2018 - Edition

I keep a running list of the hilarious, sweet, weird, and all around awesome things you say. I don't catch 'em all. A lot of the smiles and laughs and deep thoughts and little moments and conversations are ephemeral and just putting out a little warmth into the universe. The ones I write down are fun to look back at, though, and recapture a bit of the innocence, sweetness, and laughter of 2018.

I love you both more than words can say.

- Dad

Did you try carrots in ketchup? It’s so good!! You can only taste the ketchup!

Julia 1/18

I’m gonna get blue cotton candy so I can get my poop green!
-Aidan 1/18

I’m coming for you, cotton candy!
-Julia 1/18

Don’t worry, I’m brave, artistic and clever

Julia 1/18

It’s my shadow’s birthday

Aidan 1/18

The only thing that could make me sleep up here all by myself is if someone sleeps up here with me the whole night.
-Julia 1/18

I love music! That’s why I have a broken iPod!

Julia 1/18

Everything needs a smell test.
-Julia 2/18

I accidentally bent my tooth, so no more food for me. Only soup.

Aidan 2/18

Wait... so if we are mammals than we should all be talking horses!
-Julia 2/18

That’s me! I’m adventuring out into the world. Of food!

Aidan 2/18

Can I have some mint gum? My teeth need exercise, you know!

Julia 2/18

I hope you guys find something cool on the internet!
-Aidan 2/18

Mom you scared the hecks out of me!

Aidan 2/18

Dad wanna hear something? Today Duckland said I was nice and cool!!!

Aidan 2/18

I love books because they have many words and pictures and they teach you much things.

Julia 2/18

I feel like we are in a book. Wait... now I see the title! ‘Aaron and Julia walk their dogs to the park!’
-Julia 2/18

If I get a black horse I will name it Batman

They already have names

Oh . I thought it was Batman

Aidan 2/18

Rule 2: don’t slice the horse

Aidan 2/18

Dad.... three minutes ago I heard an elephant in the house. Will you help me look for it?

Julia 3/18

I had the best gardening class ever today. We got to look at soft rocks and hard rocks and I got to bring one of them into my class room!

Julia 3/18

We got to read two chapters of the BFG today! It was so awesome. There were bloodsuckers and a snozzcumber! I hope it’s not scary!
-Aidan 3/18

A: Julia, your outfit is grey-t!

J: dad, your outfit is blue-tiful!

Julia 3/18

Is it springtime? YES! No more jackets!

Julia 3/18

J: dad do you know what multiplication is?
A: no... do you want me to tell you?
J: no! No spoils!!!!
-Julia 3/18

A: what’s a ‘acrifice’?

J: yeah, what’s a ‘snackrifice’?

A&J 3/18

Sham: do you want a smartie?

A: uh.... do those make you smarter?

Aidan 3/18

D: Kids, I love you so much and I’m proud to be your daddy.
A: We know, you tell us all the time.
D: Well I just want to tell you once a day.
A: Okay but not all the time, because that will irritate us.
-Aidan 3/18

I know what real homework is: writing down important stuff and working on your computer. I think.

Julia 4/18

The grocery store makes the BEST corn on the cob!
-Julia 4/18

Dad can we get a new dog? I already wrote a note!

Julia 4/18

What is a foot’s favorite food? ... FEET-sa!

Julia 5/18

Dad you take this crystal with you to Australia. If you get lost, you rub on it and mine will glow and I’ll help you find your way

Aidan 5/18

Dad... you’ve done enough yard work. You’ve done enough.
-Julia 5/18

Can we give the dogs a bath? They smell like a million farts!

Aidan 5/18

When I was in Julia’s class I only liked cheese, but now I like pepperoni because I’m an adventure eater!

Aidan 5/18

A: who’s that’s on the oats?

J: that’s George Washington!

5/18

I’m worried about summer because I’m going to get even sweatier than this!

Julia 5/18

I’m so close to not being a picky eater. I just need to try a few more Rices and breads!
-Julia 5/18

...but I care about those dead branches!

Aidan 5/18

We slept in til eight oh oh so we won’t be cranky! Did you know that bad guys and monsters can wake up whenever they want so they can be cranky!

Aidan 5/18

 I like screens better than people.

Aidan 6/18

Dad no more jokes! This is serious! They’re gonna win!

Julia 6/18

Dad we have a serious problem... my sister is wearing your wig shower!

Aidan 6/18

Oh my god! The wagon got smaller!

Julia 6/18

You’re pops’ son, so you’re a slow poke!

Aidan 6/18

What if we lived in pepperoni town and it rained pepperoni and we could eat as much as we wanted?

Julia 6/18

Aidan repeat after me: f, bird, lollipop, camera.
-Julia 6/18

We won’t melt in the car, mom! We’re not popsicles!

Aidan 6/18

I want to be a singer so I can have a shiny microphone!

Julia 7/18

Dad, I honor you.-Aidan 7/18

(handing me a drawing he made)

Pops took us to Dunkin Donuts! Who is Duncan?

Aidan 7/18

We want to play with Toby because he’s a smart boy and... you know... Preston is old and weak....

Julia 7/18

I’m sure I’m a princess because I like music, fashion, and royalty!
-Julia 7/18

Awww but things without kids are boring!

Aidan 7/18

Hey dad when I have a sleepover at yaya's House when I'm 18 and have a phone I will text you and say 'goodnight, and I love you, and say hello to mama for me.
-Aidan 7/18

I wish I was swimming in a pool filled with yummy pink frosting!

Julia 7/18

You know I use garbage for stuff...

Julia 7/18

I will listen so Weird Al... he will comfort me!

Aidan 7/18

I can’t wait to get in the water- the sands already between my toes!
-Aidan 7/18

I only watch during the commercials because I don’t like the news. I don’t understand the news.

Julia 7/18

Goodnight sun, have a good night!

Aidan 7/18

Daddy look - the laundry hamper was so heavy and I carried all the way over here... so I earned my bumps!

Julia 8/18

It’s beach day! It’s beach day! Are you excited it’s beach day? I can feel the sand between my toes!
-Aidan 8/18

When we pee at the gas station, do you think they’ll see our naked parts?

Aidan 8/18

It’s my imagination... so I would know!
-Julia 8/18

I like commercials... they give me ideas

Julia 8/18

That’s why I like kitties so much... they love me! They’re so fuzzy and playful!

Julia 9/18

Oooh I would be delighted to go over to Oliver and Violet’s house

Aidan 9/18

Of course I’ve seen an upside down rainbow before ... Just stand on your head and look at a rainbow!
-Julia 9/18

Aidan, your breath smells like a fart... did you eat a fart?

Julia 9/18

Goodnight Toby! I hope you have wonderful dog dreams!

Aidan 9/18

Orange... the color of tic tacs.

Julia 9/18

I’m going for a vampire look with my hair.

Aidan 9/18

I would never eat a worm sandwich! Ew! A sandwich?!

Aidan 9/18

I didn’t know you could go on the moon! I didn’t know that astronauts are real! That means unicorns and dragons and fairy tales are real!
-Julia 9/18

Bone... it’s a Jurassic novel.

Julia 9/18

Rosealeigh wants us to go in the bathroom and lock the door so she can kiss me! But I told her I don’t want to!

Aidan 9/18

Baba is the only one who likes to watch the news and commercials. I like commercials. They give me ideas.
-Julia 9/18

Save the smooches for later!

Aidan 10/18

It would take whiles and years to braid mommy’s hair!

Julia 10/18

I hope there’s rock climbing again because I feel like I’m old enough and brave enough now to do it.-Julia 10/18

Really? I don’t like Houston... in movies!

Aidan 11/18

Daddy your favorite room is the bathroom! You’re always in there!

Julia 11/18

You don’t take pills, Dad. Pills are for old people!

-Aidan 12/18

Why on things like that does it say wah wah wah com?
Julia 12/18



I’m only 6 years old .... but I’m a 6 year old who can take out and put back on her own earrings!
Julia 12/18

Why do those people put up gnomes in their front yard like from Africa with camels...it’s winter!
-Julia 12/18

Three boys have crushes on me: kyler, Wesley and reed. Zoey says if I dress up really nice for the concert the boys will faint!!!!
Julia 12/18

Wingman, daddy... it means best friend
-Aidan 12/18

The Window Display and The Young Man

Aidan- you, me, and Julia went out to dinner one night.

I parked next to the Popsicle shop in the shade so we could leave from the dessert place after dinner (and so the car would be nice and cool).

We had to walk to the restaurant and on the way, we passed a lingerie store. Complete with a big window display featuring a summer selection of the types of wares they sell at a lingerie store.

I didn't think anything of it as we passed, and neither did Julia.

But we noticed you weren't with us.

We turned around.

You had stopped dead in your tracks in front of the lingerie store window. You were smiling, mouth open, eyes blinking in amazement.

Oh no...I thought! No way!

So I did what any good Dad would do...I took out my phone.

"Oh my god!" you exclaimed...stunned at what you were seeing. "I don't believe it!"

You were frozen to the ground, just staring smilingly at the window.

"What is it, Aidan?" I asked.

And what you said made my day...made my year...I haven't laughed so hard while being so relieved and surprised in a long time. I'm still laughing about it. My co-workers loved it. Mommy thought it was hilarious.

Because you replied so earnestly about the source of your astonishment.

"Look..." you said...." a BEACH-BALL! They have a beach-ball in the store! A BEACH-BALL!"

My jaw hit the ground. 

I had to look again. Yup. There it was. A beach-ball. 

Who would have guessed?

I love your innocence and your bemusement! 

I'm not sure if you were covering your tracks or not... but let's go with 'beach-ball' for now!

And that's what we did. The tacos for dinner were great! The walk back to Popsicles went off without a hitch or a second look at the beach ball store. 

And the popsicles were sweet, just like the company!